By Goddy Francis
” You f**kin did what !” Alexa shouts.
She just returned from where ever place she went to and I told her what happened.
You broke up with him ? Why would you do that ?”
I didn’t break up with him. I just needed a break.”
So what’s the difference ?”
There’s a difference. I still love him but I can’t fit into his lifestyle. It’s too much for me to handle. How long will I stop running ?” I sigh and run my palms down my arms.
Running ? Ariel , you just hurt his feelings , you broke him.”
You’re not getting it Alexa. I can’t keep up with this dangerous side of Gray. He’s the best thing that has ever happened to me , yes but….”
You can’t accept his dark past and his dark world huh ?” Alexa asks and cross her arms. She chuckles and bites her bottom lip.
I don’t mean to sound annoying, but you should stop being the hero here. Don’t try to be the good girl who’s trying to tame the bad guy. Why can’t you accept him for who he is and love him with your whole life. Why do you want the bad guy to change for you when you can actually love him with all his flaws. I believe partners stick together and fight and not run away like cowards.”
You don’t get it. I….” I sigh and facepalm myself. Yeah , I wanted the break but now I’m the one hurting.
Alexa sighs and sits down on her couch.
” Come here.” She coos.
I lay on the couch and rest my head on her laps. My hair splays on her lap and she run her fingers through my hair.
Love is crazy. You need to sacrifice a lot of things for each other. I believe he sacrificed so much for you too. I just wanna let you know that , what ever decisions you make , it’s okay.”
But , don’t keep too far from him. You guys are so f**kin in love with each other. I see no reasons in fighting over things like this. Okay I get it , it’s sort of hard to take in. And you’re that good girl who wanted to serve in a convent and you find yourself in a romance circle with the bad guy. That type of shit is really tough and hard to take in. To talk the worse ,he even killed his father.” Alexa sighs.
It’s really annoying. Why does it have to be a criminal. You know i actually never thought I would ever be in a normal relationship with someone not even Gray. Alexa he already stole my heart.”
Alexa smiles and run her fingers on my hair.
You wanna travel ?” She raises her brows and smirks.
Yup. Since we couldn’t make it last week , we could check in this week. It’s gonna be fun and it’s gonna help you think.” She says. I dare not stay back or I’ll die of depression.
Sure. I ain’t dropping this one.”
That’s my girl. Now let’s go eat dinner. I’m sure the pancakes are already cold. Piper and Brandon is coming over for sleepover.” I sit up and follow her to the kitchen.
I sigh and sit on the stool. Alexa takes the pancakes as she microwave them.
We’re gonna discuss about you and Gray later. I’m not dropping that topic.” She says and I chuckle.
I pick up a cookie from the jar and take a bite.
Did you ever withneesed any sort of fights when dating Massimo ?” I ask Alexa.
A lot. Including one that almost took my life.”
And you stayed ?” I ask and lean my elbows on the counter.
I liked him. I really love him. When my parents found out I got involved with the mafia , they panicked.”
Damn. Who wouldn’t panic ? The guns, drugs and every other illegal things. They wanted to be sure you’re safe since Ace is out.”
Yeah , true. But most times , love is crazy. It makes you do stupid things even if you’re gonna get hurt. My own opinion is, no matter the circumstances , you should stand by Gray. No one’s gonna take your life because Gray would be there for you.” Alexa says.
I shut my eyes and take a deep breath. I open them and sigh. This is too complicating. I can’t fit in. I’m not the bad girl everyone is scared of. I was the one bullied in highschool. How am I supposed to act like everything’s fine when I can’t breathe properly. They won’t stop shooting because they are all criminals. Vladimir is gone , so who’s gonna be next ? Cage ?
Who’s in the house !” Piper screams from the living room as she walks to the kitchen with Brandon.
Damn….” She sniffs and smile.” I love pancakes.” She smiles widely and sit close to me. Brandon sits on the other side opposite us while Alexa drops the pancakes on two different plates.
Hi , Arie. Ready for vacation ?”
I laugh and nod.
You’ve been acting super weird these past days. Are you okay ?” Brandon asks and pick up a cookie.
Yeah. Alexa said you got the flu. Are you pregnant ?” Piper grins and smirks.
Guys , no. I’m not pregnant , I’ve got no flue either. I’m just sick , that’s all.”
Alexa raises her brows and swirls syrup all over the pancakes. She pushes my plate to me as I pick up two forks. I give one to Piper.
” No ,I’m fine. Eat up while we plan Vacation.” Piper says.
I shrug and drop one fork as I begin to feast on my pancakes.
What did Jamie say about your vacation ?” Alexa asks Piper.
Same thing everyday. He’s gonna missed me but he’s gonna endure and wait.” Piper chuckles.
What about you Tinkerbell ?” Brandon asks and grins.
Tinkerbell ?” Alexa asks as she looks between me and Brandon. Why would Brandon call me that.
Your pendant. So don’t freak out.” Brandon utters.
Oh that. Is that what Gray usually calls you ?” Piper asks.
I really don’t wanna talk about Gray right now and they are not ready to drop it.
Yes.” I say with a tight lip smile. They smiles and nods.
Thankfully Brandon talks about school and I am grateful. We talked about winter and also Christmas even if it’s far. The semester is almost coming to an end. My
phone beeps and it’s a text message from my mom. She said she’s coming over tomorrow and she really wants to speak to us. Same pregnancy rumor.
We scatter around the couches in the living room as we watch pretty little liars.
So who do you think it’s A ?” Piper asks as she stuff her mouth with popcorns.
Maybe some weirdo who decides not to show his identity. But seriously who do you think it’s A ?” I ask and look among the guys. Brandon huffs at our disturbance and he dramatically shoots himself.
Guys , please let’s watch in silence.” Alexa shush us.
Piper and I roll our eyes same time. We turn to look at each other as we laugh.
” Really.” Brandon speaks.
We zip our mouths and pretend to throw away an imaginary key. I curl my legs and watch the series in silence. My mind drift to Gray again. Why’s relationship always complicated. I wanna run into his arms and hug him and hold him alnight but I guess I’m restricted. We watch the series till I fall asleep.
So we’re gonna need s£xy little bikinis and some lotions and sunscreen. That’s a must. I planned on shopping for new clothes once we reach Miami.” I hear Alexa’s voice.
I open my eyes and it’s morning. I’m the only one still sleeping.
Oh , she’s awake.” Alexa says as they turn to look at me. I run my fingers through my hair. ” God , morning guys.”
Morning sunshine. I think your mom called.” Brandon says.
Oh God.” I think she’s already on her way the apartment.
Thanks , Brandon. Alex , do you have any extra toothbrush.”
” Sure. There’s a bathroom down the hall. You’ll find one there.”
I smile and nod. I pick up my phone and turn to walk down the hallway.
Do you think she’s okay ?” I hear Piper asks.
Yeah.” Alexa replies.
I sigh and shake my head. I open the door to the bathroom and shut it. What’s Gray doing to me ? I lean both my hands on the edge of the washbowl and stare at my reflection on the mirror. I go through my missed calls and Gray didn’t call. Part of me liked the fact that he respected my decision. The other part hated the fact that he didn’t call. Truth is i expected him to call. I spread toothpaste on my brush and begin brushing my teeth. I wash my face when I’m through and my phone starts to ring.
I groan. I pick up my phone without looking at the dialer as I press it against my ear.
Mom , I’ll be home soon.”
Mom ?” I freeze at the voice. I bite my tongue and blame my inner self for being so attached to him.
Tinkerbell.” He sighs on the phone.
My heart drop to my feet and I literally can’t think. I mean yesterday , I told him i wanted a break and he gave me the worst reply ever. OKAY.
I missed you.” He mutters after a long silence. I look down at my fingers and look up at the mirror. I missed him too. I really wanna tell him that i missed him so badly and I wish he could adore my neck with lines of kisses and whisper his promises to my ears. But I didn’t tell him.
” Thanks.” I say.
He chuckles tiredly on the phone.
Gray , look , I’m really sorry about how I spoke yesterday. But , I meant what i said. I wanna stay away from you.”
I bet you’re doing just that. You’re not around me.” He says sarcastically. I blush and brush my hair with my palm.
Gray stop joking about. I need to be far from you so i can think.” True. I can’t seem to think around him. He has stolen my senses and I can’t just avoid him.
Okay. Have fun in Miami.” He says and before I can reply, he hangs up.
I sigh and go back to the living room. Piper and Brandon were cooking.
Oh here you’re. We were thinking on where to stay for the weekend. I suggested a beach house but Piper thought maybe a suite will be better.”
A beach house is expensive , Alexa.”
I don’t f**kin care. I need to make sure we have fun.”
We can still have fun in a suite. Alexa , a beach house is expensive. I already budget on the food , I’ll handle that.” Piper says.
I’m paying for the club we’re storming on Friday and Sunday. I have a beach house in a Miami.”
You do ?” We ask Alexa. She shrugs.
My father bought it for me or let’s say it’s my possession and part of my inheritance even if he’s not dead. So food and shelter, check.” Alexa says proudly.
What other expenses are we supposed to take ?”
I’ll pay for the clothes shopping.” I declare.
Fuck, Mrs Carter.” They give me a ear deafening scream. I roll my eyes at the last name.
Did Gray give you his credit card ?” Alexa asks as the guys watches me. I chuckle and shake my head sideways. I have made a lot of grand from babysitting Kennedy even if Gray won’t stop paying me. The money in my account right now can buy a house. Hopefully.
Don’t worry guys , I’ll handle it.” I say and cross my arms.
Fuck , girl. Aww , Brandon there’s nothing left.”
Can I handle the beach side ? I don’t wanna look left out. Since Piper is taking the food and refreshments then i could book for a swim in a hotel and also to visit the beach.”
Damn , i already got that checked before , but don’t worry I’m giving it to you.” Alexa tells Brandon.
Guys , I need to rush home. My mom’s coming over today. I need to be at home.”
Is everything okay ? Your mom don’t visit for nothing.” Piper asks with concern. Alexa already know why she’s coming. To confirm if I really committed an abortion for Gray.
It’s fine guys. I’ll be back soon.” I wave at them and pick up my key from the coffee table as I leave.
I take the elevator and rush out of it. I slide into my car and drive into the busy road. Today is Thursday and tomorrow we’re traveling. I touch my forehead and
sigh , I’ve been thinking too much. I park the car at the lot and get out. I walk inside the lobby and take the elevator. I press my floor button and it ascends. My phone buzz. I slide the screen and look at my mom’s name. She just sent me a text that she already arrived. The doors slides open and I step out. I twist the doorknob to our apartment and I walk in.
I smell lasagna and garlic bread. I shut the door and walk inside.
Hi kiddo. Mind joining us ?” I drop my keys on the table and walk to the kitchen. Leslie glares at me. Now I remembered what she said to our parents. I feel like reaping out her hair extensions.
Hi Mom.” I greet and sit on the stool across from mom and Leslie. They already arranged the food on the counter.
Hi Arie. Where were you ?”
She nods and sits down close to Leslie. Leslie pick up a fork as she starts eating.
So how have you been ?” Mom starts a conversation as she eats her bread.
Fine. You can also go straight to the point and ask me about the pregnancy.”
Ariel. Listen , I want you to understand that however I treat both of you isn’t partial. I wanted to make sure you both have a better life.” Mom says.
Leslie rolls her eyes and glares at me.
Where you pregnant ?” There. That’s what I’ve been waiting for.
I don’t know.” I say.
Leslie told me everything. How you got pregnant for Gray and he asked you to get rid of it. And you did ? What happened to all the teachings in church ? No s£x
before marriage. No abortions or even getting pregnant. Ariel, what happened to you ! You went to college and started being wayward.”
Wayward.” I chuckle.” Wayward seriously. I’m not pregnant ma and I was never pregnant. Leslie got dumped by her college sweetheart Hayden after she basically gave him a handjob in the living room. She got jealous of me and decides to bring the hate back. I don’t really know what she told you but I’m not discussing this issues.”
Really Ariel ? I got dumped ?” Leslie snorts.
Yes. And every night you keep on sneaking men inside our house. Getting drunk and coming home with different men. You know Reid picked you up from a strip club as a one night stand. You thought since you couldn’t attract Gray , you decide on using his best friend. You thought he was gonna buy you a f**kin car and he got you pregnant. He dumped you and abandoned you , even called you a bitch to your own face. Why don’t you admit you’re a looser Leslie. You’re a goddamn looser. You knew Freddie was my best friend. You had a crush on him in highschool and you never told mom the truth. You knew I was raped but your jealousy made you laugh at me. Karma is gonna f**k you real hard , you dirty bitch.”
How dare you.” Leslie stands up as she looks down at me in rage.
Enough. Leslie would never sleep with an enemy’s friend.” Mom defends.
Oh really ? But I can ?” I ask and laugh.
You’re just a whore. You…” Leslie stops and touch her stomach.
Leslie are you okay ?” Mom asks at once.
Yeah.” She wave it off. She open her mouth to speak again but halt at once. She grip to her stomach and run out of the kitchen.
Leslie..” mom and I chase after her. She run straight to the bathroom at the end of the hall. We follow as she squat close to the toilet and begin to throw up.
I widen my eyes and blink them. Hope it’s not what I’m thinking. She aborted it.
Leslie , are you okay ?” Mom rushes in as she holds Leslie’s shoulders.
Yeah , I’m fine. Maybe I got the…” she throw up again. I scrunch my face and lean against the doorframe of the bathroom.
She throw up one last time and flush it. She stands up slowly and wash her mouth. Wow this isn’t the flu. I can’t believe she’s pregnant. She touch her abdomen and bite her lip.
What’s wrong with you Leslie ?” Mom asks.
I don’t know. I’m…”
Mom touches Leslie’s forehead and she stops at once. She looks down at Leslie and scan her up and down. She turns around and walk out of the bathroom. I look at Leslie and her stomach before following mother.
” I f**kin got rid of you. Why are you still in my stomach.” I hear Leslie mutters.
Mom pace around the living room. She’s finding it hard to believe that her precious daughter is pregnant for Gray Carter’s druggie friend. Oh karma , take kisses.
Mom…” Leslie calls.
You’re pregnant ?” Mom asks as she turns to look at Leslie. I slump on the couch and watch the show.
Oh my God. You got pregnant after all my teachings. So you were the pregnant one and you lied. Leslie what’s wrong with you !” Mom yell.
Yes , I’m pregnant. I was pregnant and I got rid of it because I wasn’t ready to bear the shame. How am I supposed to know the baby didn’t flush out even after i bled.” Leslie yells .
I bet Reid’s gonna be happy he’s expecting a child. A really stubborn one at that.
Leslie what’s wrong with you ! Why can’t you be like Ariel ?” What the heck is she talking about.
Oh I should be like Ariel now.”
Yes! Because she’s better than you. I brought you to college to go to school and not spread your legs apart for anything with a manhood. You’re a disgrace Leslie.”
How’s it my fault ? What type of mom are you ? You act like you’re perfect. You cheated on dad even with all your fake life.”
I cheated ? Oh my God you’re such a fool. Because I cheated on your dad five years ago you thought it was nice to open your legs and do whatever thing you want. I tried to caution you but you’re this little slut i tried to mould into perfection. But you’re so dumb , really dumb. Who the f**k is responsible !” Mom yell even louder. So mom also swear. Damn, i wish I can hold them apart , hell no , we ain’t done. I wish there’s a popcorn.
Leslie I said who’s responsible ?” Mom yells.
She won’t tell you. She’s ashamed. Its Mia Carter’s druggie son’s best friend called Reid. They met in a strip club.” I answer.
Gray’s friend. You really slept with the enemy ? You knew what transpired between your father and his mother five years ago and you still have to spread your legs for him. Because of what ! A stupid car .”
Oh I get the logic. The cheating happened same year. Dad cheated first and mom found out. She felt betrayed and then her boss picked an interest in her and then they had s£x. Wow. I love this story.
” Reid isn’t responsible.” Leslie burst out.
“I’m sorry, what did you say ?”
Reid isn’t the father. I lied. I couldn’t tell the real father. I was scared of being rejected. The day Reid and i had an affair the second time I was already pregnant.”
I blink my eyes and stare at Leslie with wide eyes. If Reid isn’t the father then who. Hayden ?
Leslie who’s responsible ?” Mom asks calmly this time.
It’s…” she stutters. She’s already crying. I pity her.
Leslie talk. Who got you pregnant.”
My… it’s Lawson. My philosophy professor at school and he’s married with a kid.”
Mom fainted at once.
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