She was about lieing down to rest when her phone
rang and the ringing stopped 2 seconds later.
“Ohhh, who is this person flashing me?” Lolade
grumbled as she unlocked her phone to view the
“missed caller”. She dropped it there after and lied
down unclad facing the wall as I lied behind her. I
looked straight at the phone and I noticed that it was
unlocked. “Hurrayyy!!!” Time for me to see lolade’s
I was cuddling her to a light sleep as I pressed a
button on the phone to prevent it from locking. When
I observed that she had partially slept off, I picked
the phone to look at the call list, behold, I saw
several call logs between her and my manager.
“What could be between my girl and the manager?”
I was curious and I decided to check the message
folder. I saw Intimate message conversation between
my manager and her. I couldn’t believe my eyes as I
scrolled down the more. I saw a text where my
manager was hailing her for how sweet she was on
bed. And I saw a sent message where she was
appreciating my manager for giving her 10k “chaiiiii,
no wonder that she was my manager’s favourite of
recent”. I looked out for more messages and I
discovered that lolade was also dating another
undergraduate of EKSU. “””Chaiiii, this girl don use
my head fa!!”. I wanted to confront her but I had a
second thought of ignoring the situation and
continued to Bleep her till. She gains admission.
I dropped her phone and pretended as if nothing
happened. She woke at around 5pm and she decided
to leave and I saw her off to where she board a bike,
I returned home and began to think of how to get a
Another 9 months later, lolade had gotten admission
into delta state university and resigned from work. At
first, it was difficult for me to cope without her around
me due to the fact that I couldn’t get my regular
sunday-sunday free punany to Bleep again, but along
the line, I started thinking of a replacement.
I was coming to work one morning when I overheard
one of our factory workers discussing with his friend on
how he met a girl through badoo. Instantly, I
remembered I once had an account with badoo which I
never used for over a year. I got to my table that day
and logged on to my badoo on my phone, I checked out
some girls who are closer to me. I drafted a short
romantic introductory sermon and did copy and paste
to about 15 of them introducing myself and telling
them to reply me with their BBM pins for a better
When I got home in the evening, I checked on my
account and saw a message from a girl named “Betty”.
She replied my mail with her bbm pin and I added her
I checked out her pictures and they were fine and ok,
she has an average height, fair in complexion, she has a
little big butts with an average size oranges. We got
talking along the line and she told me she is 26, based
in lagos and came to vist her Grandma in Ado ekiti.
Within a 2 weeks, we became friends and we had
started talking on phone and exchanging text
messages. I found her so caring and loving. She would
always call me like thrice a day and she would always
engage me in chats. I so much like betty and I never
had any lustful thoughts towards her.
I told her to visit me at home but she refused. I tried
persuading her but betty won’t just agree to visit.
When I saw that it wasn’t working, I told her to visit
me at my work place and she refused also. She said
we can only meet at an eatery.
“Which kind rubbish be this na “.
I wanted to back out because other girls had also been
responding to me from badoo. I don’t want a
commitment relationship, all I want is just a Bleep-
mate. But as days went by, I found myself falling
inlove with betty. I was so much inlove with her that I
wasn’t having the courage to ask her out so as not to
ruin our friendship.
At last, we both agreed to meet at one eatery in Ado
ekiti on a saturday afternoon.
On that fateful saturday, I had my bath, freshen up, put
on a nice wear and proceed to the eatery. As my
custom, anytime I wanted to meet any lady in a eatery,
I always get there first before the lady so as to look
through the glass to observe if she is coming alone or
coming with hungry friends, and the moment I
observed that she had friends tagged with her, I simply
use the exit door so as not to embarass myself when I
couldn’t foot bills.
I got to the eatery at 12 noon and gave her a call and
she told me that she was on her way, I found an empty
seat close to the glass and I was observing from the
glass to see her when she is coming. I looked and
looked for over 40minutes and I couldn’t see her. I
called her phone again and she wasn’t picking up.
“Haaaa!!!, abi this girl don disappoint me ni?”.
After several minutes of hopeless waiting. I went to the
table and I ordered for a pie with a can of coke, I
returned to my table and I was watching music videos
been played on sound city and eating the pie little by
little so as to sustain me till her arrival and beyond. I
was so much carried away by the music videos and I
forgot that I was waiting for someone. About 5 minutes
later, I saw a lady walking into the eatery, she looked
so much like betty and I was convinced that she was
the one and I waved at her. She saw me and she came
to my side and sat down infront of me. Betty wasn’t
flashy. She wore a simple ankara gown, no heavy
makeup and her hair was packed to the back and not
“Chaiii, this girl na one hungry girl oooo, she no even
dey sophisticated” I thought as I was smiling and
staring at her.
ME: my dearest betty, I set my eyes on you atlast.
BETTY: hmmmm, same here.
ME: **stretched forward** so, what do you care for?
**** heart beating faster make she no demand for 5
plates of chicken****
BETTY: a bottle water and probably a pie is ok.
ME: **this babe dey form for me abi?, me sef go form
Porsche**, no dear, you can’t take that, let me get you
a plate of rice and soft drinks.
BETTY: no, I’m purging so I don’t take soft drinks, and I
just finished eating rice with grandma at home, so my
tommy is filled up already.
ME: ***hmm, thank God, atleast, my money is saved**
Are you sure you are ok with that?, or you think I won’t
be able to foot bills **smiled***
BETTY: ***laughed*** you are so funny onihaxy. So
you mean you have money to foot bills?
ME: **laughed** yes na
BETTY: don’t worry then, I will get a take away for
myself, grandma, and my little sisters at home when
I’m leaving here.
ME: ***chaiiii, I don die today, onihaxy!!, see how your
mouth pushed you inside trouble********