Tue. May 28th, 2024

We are at the first week of December and Christmas was all over the air, our bank was designed at the entrance and inside the banking hall, arrangements towards the end of the year Christmas party celebration commenced. Committees were set up in the bank to organize various activities like game competition, beauty pageant, welfares to the orphanages and lots more. At the beginning of the second week, arrangement towards the intake of the incoming project staffs started. An office was provided and I could see furniture’s and computers being moved into the room. new people had been invited for interview two weeks earlier and rumours has it that 60% of the temporary staffs would be from the previous crew whom I worked together with when I was a temporary staff while 40% will be new set of people entirely. Names were compiled and people were sent text messages to go to lekki for their offer letter and resume the following Monday which was December 20th.
The guys In my unit started jubilating because the workload on us would be reduced because the project would be taking place in my unit, others were happy because lots of new fishes would be introduced into the river and it was like a ritual in my bank where permanent staffs would always look up to project periods to catch new set of babes who would be recruited for the project.
In the morning of the second day which was Tuesday, we had a general meeting in my unit and FUNMI was a guest in the meeting, she entered in the course of the meeting and she walked to the front of the podium after when my unit head recognized her presence. We all clapped for her as she stood up and looking stunning in a nice suit and Brazilian hair. “chaiiii, FUNMI never seize to disappoint at all”. she appreciated everyone for our works from onset and she appraised the hardworking staffs with promises that the management was watching us, she went further to appeal to all of us to cooperate and assist the incoming staffs especially the fresh ones because we are the one hosting them as the project belongs exclusively to our unit, she begged us to put anyone with challenges through and also encourage and motivate them to work harder. And lastly, she said the project staffs would be divided into 5 teams comprising of 10 people each and as a result of that, 5 people would be selected among us to be team leads throughout the project and she begged everyone not to be sad in case the appointment of the team lead doesn’t favour them while emphasizing that it doesn’t come with any additional salary, its just a temporary role to lead the new staffs towards achieving the bank’s goals. She ended her speech by reminding us about the end of the year party and begged us to prepare well for it and we all clapped for her while she left the meeting room. We discussed many other issues in the meeting before it was brought to an end. As I was about leaving the meeting room, my friends in the unit and some other people started teasing me and they started planning to place a bet on me. one of them said ” let’s place a bet, I can bet it with all the money in my account that onihaxy is going to be one of the team leads” , another person said to the first speaker ” you are right ooooooo, I never thought of it ooooo, but come to think of it, if onihaxy is going to be a team lead, then he must leave his present desk in front of funmi’s office to stay with the new staffs in the office provided for them and I don’t think FUNMI is ready to let him go”, they continued to argue until they both agreed on a bet of N5,000 and the first guy said to me “onihaxy, please beg FUNMI to make you a team lead, let me chop this boy’s money abeg”. I just laughed as I left there and returned to my office in other to continue with my job for the day. At around 10am, Betty called me on phone to inform me that she would be coming back to Nigeria on the 23rd of December and that she would be coming straight to my place before going to visit henry, I was so happy and I screamed out loudly that the gossip crew in my office began to look at me in an awkward way. I was so overwhelm that I was just smiling to myself
“finally, I will be seeing my baby”
” I can’t wait for that day to come”
” it’s just as if I should fast forward the days to 23rd of December”
” I’m very sure that she is going to bring something special for me”
” I’m so lucky to have a girl like Betty”
I was in the midst of my sweet thoughts that I didn’t realize that time had gone and it was break time. I was still working when I received a mail from FUNMI to come over to her office and with lots of joy inside of me, I jumped up from my desk and went into funmi’s office, I pulled out the guest’s chair and sat down.
ME: HI funmi, I received your mail.
FUNMI: I just want to ask if you will be going out for break
ME: yes. I will
FUNMI: Ok, please you will help me with a plate of rice and chicken
ME: ***smiled*** no problem
FUNMI: this one that you are smiling since morning, what is happening now?, what is the secret?
ME: I’m just happy for no reason today sha and I don’t know why.
FUNMI: are you sure there is nothing attached to it?
ME: yes, I’m so sure.
FUNMI: I know you won’t say the truth.
ME: *** surprised**** the truth as how?
FUNMI: I know you are happy because your wife is coming back abi?
ME: ****Shocked and began to wonder how she knew**** my wife?, you mean my wife?, how did you know?, why did you think so?
FUNMI: ***Smiled*** how many question at a time?
ME: I’m sorry, I’m just curious to know why you said so.
FUNMI: because she has already received a text to resume on Monday, I know you are happy because you will be able to continue from where both of you stopped.
ME: Ok!!!!!, you mean Benita?
FUNMI: yes of course.
ME: ****smiled***** the funny thing is that she hasn’t told that she received any text.
FUNMI: hmmmmmmmmmmm, I know you would deny it. welldone ooo.
ME: ****smiled*******
FUNMI: that reminds me, are you interested in Teamlead role?
ME: ****smiled**** I will appreciate it if I’m given the opportunity to lead people.
FUNMI: Ok, get yourself prepared ahead of Monday then.
ME: **** happy mood***** waooooh, thank you so much FUNMI, I so much appreciate.
FUNMI: you are welcome.
I left funmi’s office with duo happiness inside of me.
“my dearest Betty is coming back to Nigeria”
” I’m also been appointed as a Teamlead”
” waoooooh, lucky me onihaxy”
I drove out hapilly to the canteen to eat, I gist segun about the latest news about Betty’s arrival and also my appointment as a team lead and he was so happy with me. I finished with my food and drove to the regular eatery where I always buy funmi’s food and I bought her rice and drove back happily to the bank. I returned her food to her and continued with my work till the end of the day. my coworkers on same office with me began to wonder what could be happening to me and why I was happy but they couldn’t figure it out because the rumours of Teamlead appointment hadn’t spread to them yet.
I closed for the day and was about driving home when my joy mood was spoiled by benita’s call.
ME: hello Benita.
BENITA: Hi onihaxy. how are you and how is work today?
ME: Fine
BENITA: I’m so sorry for not calling you all this while, I haven’t been boxed up of recent
ME: No problem.
BENITA: I want to tell you that I received a text form our outsourcing service provider to come for offer letter this week so as to resume to the bank next week Monday.
ME: ok
BENITA: I will be moving in on Thursday morning. please make sure you clean the house and stock the kitchen with enough food stuffs, you know I don’t like to be starved.
ME: *****chai!!!!!, see how this one is controlling me, how do I kick her away now oooooh God!!!!!!!!******

Adebimpe: The Facebook Girl – Episode 174

ME: eeehm Benita, there is a latest development.
BENITA: latest development?, what is that?
ME: my two cousins got a job here in Lagos and they have resumed work since December 1st and they are living with me. Also, one of my friends in Mushin had accommodation problem and he had joined me to stay for the main time pending the time he will resolve his problem. so, we are now four guys in the house and I don’t know if you will be able to manage among us.
BENITA: haaa!!!, four guys including you?
ME: yes.
BENITA: I don’t think I will be able to manage among you guys oooo, especially the three strange guys. if they are people I knew before, it would have been better.
ME: Eeeyahh
BENITA: or is there a way the other 3 guys can be staying in the parlour so that you and I can stay in the room?
ME: That will be somehow difficult Benita. you know that both bathroom and wardrobe are in the room, only the kitchen is located in the parlour. they will also need to access both the wardrobe and bathroom on daily basis.
BENITA: haaaa, what will I do now?
ME: maybe you should try to talk to that your sister you were staying with before, maybe she can help .
BENITA: That one?, lailai, we insulted each other the day I was moving out of her house, I can never go there again.
ME: Huuuuuuh, what about your friends back then in bank?, maybe you should talk to any of them, they might accommodate you for the main time.
BENITA: ooooooh God!!!!, ok, let me discuss with Amaka, I will give you feedback later.
ME: ooooh, that’s good.
BENITA: and if she can’t help, that means I will forget about the job because I don’t have any other person to stay with.
ME: I pray you find a solution from Amaka. please don’t turn down the job, I have misses you and really want to be seeing your face again.
BENITA: Alright dear, thanks so much.
I ended the call with Benita and couldn’t help it but to laugh out loudly.
” see this badluck girl ooooo”
” s£x, she didn’t allow”
” romance, she would refuse”
” her own is just to eat my food, position herself at the front seat of the car without any benefit”
” she doesn’t touch her salary anymore as I took over every responsibilities”
” At the end of the day, she would go back to her man for s£x while I was always at the losing end.”
” enough of endless temptations”
” now, she want to spoil the atmosphere between Betty and I”
” nonsense!!!!”.
I started the car engine and I drove back hone with laughter. I got home and updated segun on phone about what transpired between Benita and I.
ME: hello SEGE.
SEGE: how far onihaxy?
ME: I dey ooo. Benita called me this evening after the good news from Betty and FUNMI.
SEGE: what did she say?
ME: She said she got a message from the bank to resume on Monday too for the project and she told me that she would be moving in to my place on Thursday.
SEGE: move in to your place?, when Betty will be coming back next week?, what kind of game are you trying to play onihaxy and how do you intend to contain both of them?
ME: I said to her that there is a new development and that I have 2 cousins and a friend staying with me presently just as you told me to do.
SEGE: that’s good of you. and what was her response and reaction?
ME: she said I should try and discusses with the guys to occupy the living room while she and I remain in the bedroom.
SEGE: Haha, this girl is becoming something else oo, dictating to you in your house?
ME: I tire ooooo
SEGE: and what did you tell her?
ME: I told her that it will be impossible because we all have to share both bathroom and wardrobe which are located in the bedroom.
SEGE: nice response.
ME: she later said she would contact one of her friends to see if she could help. and in case she couldn’t get any help, she would reject the offer.
SEGE: that is just the best thing for her to do. abi of what importance was she to you in the house in the first place ?, you are just too cool for my liking onihaxy. if it were to be me, I can’t stay too long in the kind of dangerous friend zone, especially when it involved us sharing same bed.
ME: hmmmmm
SEGE: but all the same, its cool now that you are getting wiser. start preparing for the arrival of your wife.
ME: thanks jaree.
SEGE: And if I were you, I will start clearing anything connecting to FUNMI and BIMPE that can incriminate you.
ME: Yeah, that is true. I will start that immediately.
SEGE: Ok, that’s good.
ME: Let’s chats tomorrow, I want to sleep because I need to wake up very early.
SEGE: No wahala. take care.
I ended the chats and I started clearing all incriminating text messages and chat conversations from my phone as well as removing all the female leftover items of Benita from every part and corner of the room.

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