CHAPTER THIRTY SIX
A week later,
“Divorce isn’t such a tragedy. A tragedy is staying in an unhappy marriage, teaching your children the wrong things about love. Nobody ever died of divorce.”
“Daddy, what time is mummy coming?” Talia asks
“Soon,” I respond
The girls and I are sitting in the living room waiting for Tasha, we are finally gonna tell them about the divorce.
I didn’t want to do this, I wanted to wait a little longer but Tasha insisted.
I am so scared right now, I want to disassociate myself from this moment, I wish I could disappear and come back when it’s over. Because who wants to tell their kids that their parents won’t be together anymore.
I love Tasha a lot and it breaks my heart so see her with another man but if this is what she wants then I have no option but to let her go. I want Tasha to be happy even if it’s not with me.
Feeling another person’s presence in the room, I look up from the television to find Tasha I didn’t even hear her walk in.
“Mummy!” Talia says glancing over her.
“Hey my darling,” she responds
“Taylor,” she scopes the girl into her hands and kisses her forehead.
She talks to the kids for a few minutes before she turns towards me, “Hey Fred.”
“Hey,” I respond.
“Talia can you please get me some water,” she says before she sits down on the couch across from mine.
Talia runs off to the kitchen and returns a minute later with a glass of water which she hands to her mother. I watch as Tasha rapidly drinks her water before she places the glass on the table.
“You are okay?” I ask
“Yes,” she nods her head.
There is an uncomfortable silence in the room before Tasha clears her throat and intently stares at me. Does she expect me to start the discussion? She put us in this mess she has to break the news to the girls.
“Girls,” I begin. “Your mother and I have something to tell you.”
“Oh,” Talia exclaims
“You can go ahead Tasha,” I say
She shoots me a look and clears her throat again, “Girls, do you know how much your father and I love you?” she asks
“Yes,” they respond in unison
“How much?” she asks
“You love us more than anyone in this world,” Talia says
“Exactly,” I shot in, “Your mother and I love you a lot you are the most important people in our lives.”
Talia beams while Taylor kicks her feet, I wish we didn’t have to do Taylor is too young to understand.
“Sometimes parents decide not to live together anymore when things don’t work out,” I continue
Talia nods her head she is a smart little girl, I am sure she will figure it out one way or another.
“Mum and dad are getting a divorce do you know what that means?”
Talia tips her head to the side, “A divorce? You aren’t going to be together any more like Kendall’s parents?”
I let out a sigh and swallow hard, Kendall is her friend from school and church, her parents got a divorce last year. For a few seconds neither of us responds finally Tasha breaks the silence.
“Yes, we won’t be living together anymore.”
“But that isn’t fair.”
“I know it isn’t fair but that’s how life is sometimes,” Tasha responds
“Where are we going to stay?” Taylor asks, I look at Tasha, we haven’t discussed that yet.
“You will be staying with your father, I will get you weekends and holidays,” she says
“Is this our fault? Have we been bad girls?” Talia sniffles wiping her eyes before the tears can fall.
It breaks my heart to see her in this state I would do anything to reverse this conversation. I have failed my children I promised them a good stable family but look at us now?
“It’s not your fault we both still love you a lot,” Tasha says
“But you are leaving?”
“Yes but we will still get to spend some time together.” “Okay.”
“I don’t want to be without you mummy,” Taylor starts crying.
“Please don’t make this harder than it is,” Tasha says
“You are being insensitive,” I respond
She ignores me.
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“Girls, we love you a lot, we just can’t leave in the same house anymore and you know mummy is busy, you will have more fun with your father.”
Talia stands up and runs off to her room, Tasha is about to go after her but I stop her.
“Give her time.”
“That was disrespectful.”
“She is just a child.”
I pick Taylor up, “It’s going to be fine,” I say before I set her down brushing my fingers through her hair. “Hey baby, go to your room so that daddy and I can talk,” she says “Okay.”
“That didn’t go so well,” Tasha says
“Ya it didn’t go.”
“The kids get to stay with you,” she says. “I will see them weekends and holidays.” “You are leaving them behind because of a man?” “Don’t start with me.”
“Does he know you have kids?” I ask
“Fred? I love my children but I can’t move in with them, it’s too soon, it will be too confusing for them.” “Okay.”
“The divorce papers will be ready by next week, I don’t want anything from you, you can keep it all,” she says “Okay.”
“Do you have any questions regarding the divorce? Any objections?”
“I am good.”
“Thank you.”
“You are welcome.”
“I will take my leave now.”
“Sure.”
She rises to her feet, grabs her bag and walks out of the house, lord! How did we get here? So she has seriously given up on us?
*****
“This is getting too complicated,” I yell
“Calm down,” she says on the other end of the line.
“It’s been two weeks already and my wife will be coming back home any day, what’s the plan?”
“Phase three is almost done you will be out of the picture sooner that you think.”
“Do something.”
“I am working towards that.”
“A week, that’s all I am giving you.”
“Thank you so much, I owe you one.”
“I will talk to you later, I think Tasha is home.”
“Alright.”
I end the call as Tasha walks in to the room.
“Hey,” she walks over to me and lightly kisses my lips.
“Hey you,” I fake a smile, I am tired of pretending, I want get this over and done with. I miss my wife and daughter I can’t wait to have them back home.
“I am tired,” she says sitting on the bed.
“How did it go with Fred and the girls?”
“Bad but I am sure they are gonna be fine.”
I look at her and for a moment I frown, what sort of woman is she? Tasha is selfish, she only cares for herself, I feel sorry for those children, they don’t deserve a mother like her, they deserve better.
******
DIARY OF A TORMENTED HUSBAND